Movie Quotes: REVEALED

The movie quotes are from "Waking Ned Devine", "A Hard Day's Night", and "Noises Off", respectively. All worth a watch, if you haven't yet.

Quote two is about John McCartney, allegedly Paul's grandfather. The running joke throughout the film is various random people commenting that he's very clean. It's funny even now, but it's an inside joke; Back when the movie was made (1964) the same actor, Wilfrid Brambell, played a regular role on a British sitcom where he was regularly called a "dirty old man".

I need a hobby . . . a DIFFERENT hobby.

Name The Movies

See if you can guess the film for each of these movie quotes.

Quote 1:
" . . . but Michael's never told a lie in his life."
"Aye, well, he's making up for it now, so . . . ?"

Quote 2:
"John (surname omitted). Filthy rich, of course."
"I don't know . . . he looks quite clean to me . . ."

Quote 3:
"Are you in?"
"In?"
"Are you there?!"
"What?"
"You're out, okay . . . I'll call again . . . "

Planes, Trai - well, Planes and Automobiles

Started off for Ohio on Saturday morning, hoping to spend as much of my small window of time with Jen's family as possible. Halfway to the Tennessee state line, the transmission of the car I was driving started slipping badly. Rather than risk getting stuck somewhere in the hills of Kentucky, I decided to turn back. As my other car is not in much better condition, and after talking with Jen, we decided I should rent a car. So much for getting an early start.

Limped home, logged on, reserved a car. No sweat.

I then drove to the airport where the rental company was located. This, of course, being the holiday weekend, I had to park in overflow parking, which is somewhere in the vicinity of Lebanon. Took a very slow moving bus from there to the terminal.

Always a strange feeling being at an airport with suitcases but not flying anywhere. I feel like a fraud, somehow.

Anyway, at the rental counter, I was informed that I could NOT rent a car from the airport location using only a debit card if I was not, in fact, FLYING either to or from Nashville International. I would have to go to an alternate location, where I could rent a car from their company. Logic and common sense miss yet another foothold.

Out to the curb I went with my bags, and waited for an overflow bus. And waited. And waited. Time with my family sliding irrevocably into the past, I asked the driver of a bus labeled "Longterm" if an overflow bus was coming anytime soon. "Oh, we'll get one over here right away". Apparently, somebody who was supposed to drive a bus from my lot over to the terminal "forgot" or something. You got me; must be very involved being a bus driver at the airport.

Tick . . . Tick . . . Tick . . .

So back I went to overflow, picked up my car, and drove to the alternate rental location, successfully procuring an automobile. Happy ending; I made it home with some time to spare to get to the Christmas Eve service.

Hope you all had Merry Christmases.

Atta boy, Clarence . . .

OTHER THAN It's A Wonderful Life, which, if you're not planning to watch you're a heathen beast from hell, any holiday movies/specials you have fond memories of, or are looking forward to rewatching soon? Common to obscure, you pick.

Mrs. Encyclopedia Seinfeldica

We all have unusual gifts, talents, and, well, knacks for things. I tend to remember lines of dialogue I've heard and can parrot them back with decided accuracy, which is sometimes useful for low-brow entertainment purposes. This is okay, but my wife has a creepy ability to organize in her head complex plotlines to television programs and, in some cases, COMIC STRIPS, with powers of instant recall that make the Pentium 4 chip look like a geriatric cassette tape drive.

This talent will normally manifest in direct relation to "Seinfeld", "the Simpsons", and "King of the Hill", but there are other examples. She first discovered her super-power as it emerged for the comic strip "Bloom County", which ran for several years in the 80's. You could tell her the dialogue from the first panel of the strip (from among thousand of strips), and she could give you the last panel. You may ask her, "Remember the episode where Elaine's cousin is dating Jerry", and she would outline the enitre episode with each character's storyline for you. Mr. Dewey of the famed decimal system would be proud, but would most likely want his mommy.

Challenge her on this some time. She may frighten you, but you will not be disappointed.

A window seat on the bandwagon, please . . .

7 Things . . .

To do before I die;

1. Adopt a child
2. Visit Ireland (with Jen - she ain't goin' without me)
3. Drive from NY to LA
4. Be driving in a city in which I do not live and hear a song I've written on mainstream radio
5. Give a very large sum of money to someone
6. Skydive (hopefully not just before I die)
7. Get my brakes fixed

I cannot do;

1. Tie my shoes like a normal human being (check me out some time - it's disturbing)
2. Play a wind instrument (other than kazoo, on which I ROCK)
3. Knowingly eat onion in any of its discernable forms
4. Watch Fear Factor. Some things are JUST NOT FOOD!
5. Not try to be funny. Like this needed to be said.
6. Shoot a 3-pointer. Total fluke if it goes in.
7. Think of a seventh thing.

That attract me to my spouse;

1. She is awesomely compassionate
2. She is consistently funny
3. Her ever-present smile
4. That she's always willing to see the silly side of things
5. That she is always willing to believe the best of people
6. That she is NEVER willing to hurt someone's feelings
7. The voice, baby - the VOICE!

I say most often;

1. I love you
2. (Insert Seinfeld reference)
3. (Insert Friends reference)
4. (Insert Frazier reference)
5. Sorry. / Sorry?
6. Do you want room for cream?
7. Who wants popcorn?!

Books I love;

1. The 66 books of the Bible . . . well, most of them. Numbers is tough.
2. Mere Christianity (C.S. Lewis)
3. Everyday Apocolypse (David Dark)
4. Imagine (Steve Turner)
5. When No One Sees (Os Guinness)
6. The New Breed (Gary Chester)
7. Stick Control (G.L. Stone)

Movies I could watch over and over (and have and do);

1. Love, Actually
2. The Matrix
3. Saving Private Ryan
4. To End All Wars
5. Dumb And Dumber
6. Christmas Vacation
7. Any of the MST3K films

People I want to tag (limiting to mere humans);

1. Bono
2. Pope Benedict XVI
3. The Apostle Paul
4. Gordon Sumner
5. Anne Rice (Now, and before)
6. Martin Scorsese
7. Fred Astaire

"Reality" bytes

Interesting to note that to the same degree that my wife is drawn to reality programing, I am repulsed by it. The problem I have with it is that these shows consistantly give the human species such ample opportunity to showcase its dark side. I'm not saying that I'm any better than these people, I just don't find it entertaining to watch people be the jerks they are. Not to mention the fabricated moments of drama throughout each episode. "And the next person to be eliminated . . . . . from . . . . . . . . . . . (insert show title here) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . (the viewer dozes off and suddenly awakens, uncertain of how much time has passed) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . IS . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . "

It must be said that having spent most of the 90's as a devotee to Must-See-TV on Thursday nights, I am now wise to the hypnosis television shows employ to keep us tuning in week after week for fear of missing out on some new development that will "change EVERYTHING". Ross and Rachel cured me of that.

The joys of Tennessee winters Amy Grant doesn't sing about

For starters (no automotive pun intended), yesterday was a rainy day. I don't mind rainy days unless they are subsequently followed by dramatic drops in temperature. The net effect is that all that sogginess turns to solid ice.

Thus this morning when I left the house at the less-than-happy hour of 4:30am, my car door locks were frozen, and all the doors frozen shut. My only recourse was to open the back hatch and climb across three rows of seats to get the the driver's seat of my van, start the engine (which sounded genuinely surprised that it was being asked to awaken at such an cold and unfriendly hour), and make my way to Starbucks, looking through the six-inch hole I was able to create in the frost on my windshield, hoping to avoid trees, other vehicles and the odd dog-sled.

Wait - it gets better . . .

Upon arriving at work (on time, thank you), a couple of my car doors had unlocked but were not yet thawed enough for me to get out. To further complicate things, there is no handle to open the back hatch from the inside. My only solution? The passenger side window was the only one that would open sufficiently for me to exit a la Luke Duke. But in order to then close that window, I had to RE-ENTER my vehicle through the back hatch, climb across the seats once more, turn the key to close the window, then back out the hatch again. Once closed, the doors were still too frozen to lock.

My waiting co-workers were stunned and amazed by this performance that was both impressive and somehow painfully pathetic.

Not a snowflake in sight, mind you. That's the worst part, I think.

A noir-ish photo for your viewing pleasure

Note the cool steely determination. Of the guitar, not me.

Well, we're back . . . in the car again . . .

After a frenzied trip to Gainesville, GA and back in the last 48 hours, I look forward to heading north to Louisville tomorrow, in the hopes that there might be something there of more interest than simply staying right here at home. This hurts, barbershop or no. I miss my house, which I continue paying on a monthly basis to enjoy.

Another mindless lemming diving in head-first . . .

I really just created this so I could comment on my wife's clever and useful musings. Maybe there will be something of use to you here, but I doubt it.